you guys were way drunker than both of me
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
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