So drunk its hurt
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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