Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Randomize
