were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
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