I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
