Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Well I just put wine in my tea
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
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