I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
being pregnant is like rehab
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize