So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
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