You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
