no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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