How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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