Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
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