8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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