BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?