please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
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That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!