And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I deserve this hangover.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
