chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
