ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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