the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
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