And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
