Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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