Quick, to the slutcave!
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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