I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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