no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
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