nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
