Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
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all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
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You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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