DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
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