Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
