Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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