So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
God I need to hump something, right now.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize