goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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