from now on my penis is your penis
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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