Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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