quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
