let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
