It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
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