I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize