This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
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He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
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It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize