all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize