Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
