and you said cock pushups were impossible
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize