Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
