He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize