Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
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