WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize
