Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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