Please, let me fuck your mom
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
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