yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
