I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
