I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
