Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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