'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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